As humans we intently, without knowing we do so, think of ourselves as the “center of the universe.”  Narcissism set aside, along with your defenses, you must accept this fact to fully appreciate what I’m about to present to you.

Reflect on your life in this moment as you are now living it.  You want to be happy, do you not?  Why would you just accept your own dissatisfactions as “part of who you are”?  Why would you wait?  What are you waiting for?  Wait… how do we survive if we don’t wait?  If we don’t continue our lives methodically, with financial gain and purpose will we, undeniably, lose?  Self-reflection has taken a strange back seat in our modern, American society.  Dull and unempowering jobs become the center of our routines as we disregard our own true happiness.  Our societal views interpret self-reflection and analysis as a hindrance to the working person’s daily routine.  Many of us have fallen into a script based on what we think we should be doing and how we think we should be living.  Rather than bettering our spirits by truly living; we accept the mundane routines that supply a livable income.  We are getting by like.  We don’t look into ourselves for answers anymore because it is often easier not to.  Do you want to reflect on your life near its end and say to yourself, “I made it.”?  Or do you want to look back and say, “now that was what it’s all about!”?  Do you want to accept the dingy primer on your walls of life?  Or, do you want to paint your walls with a myriad of colors?  As free-willed human-beings, we don’t have to rob ourselves of fulfillment.

The first step, and the most difficult, to putting meaning and joy in your life; is merely the decision to do so.  Excuses are aplenty.  The decision to stop making them is the true sign of character and determination.  I can tell you from experience that the habit of making excuses is the hardest one I’ve attempted to defeat.  For the most part, I can now do things without excuses.  I still catch myself letting them slip off my tongue on occasion.  Once you set the wheels in motion, however, you’re far more likely to be successful in what you’re trying to achieve.

  After you’ve made the decision towards fulfillment you can start examining yourself internally.   The most affective way to begin self-examination, and therefore lead yourself to a purposeful life, is to start from the beginning and work your way to this point.  Psychological techniques, such as the ‘socratic’ method of self-dialogue, can help you determine the patterns of your history and where changes can be made.  For example, my close friend, Gage, has become my therapist.  Not professionally but socially.  And I have become his therapist.  He helps me understand why I have certain types of people in my life and what draws them to me and vis versa.  He helps me see things I wouldn’t normally see for myself.  We help each other in this way just by open dialogue and self-reflecting aloud together.  After two years of this relationship, I have found growth and change within myself.  That can be the simplest, yet most affective step in starting a purposeful and gratifying life.  Have a friend that you can trust with all parts of your life.  It could also be a therapist or a family member. 

It is definitely possible to survive in this life if you take a leap and make a choice. Our fears can control what we do not do a lot more than they control what we actually do.  It’s often what we don’t do that creates this abundant discontent.  We have become engrained with the idea that our protective shields will ensure safety.  Our shields can confine us.  We can slowly and silently fade away by the hand of our own self-protection.  How often do you want to think back, “what if I would have?”  There’s a far greater chance of inner happiness when you change your mindset to something more along the lines of, “what’s the worst that could happen if I try it?”  Think of the worst case scenario for taking control of your own destiny.  It doesn’t work out?  Well, how could that risk possibly not be worth it?  You can be left with the satisfaction of true effort.  Do you believe a person’s life could get worse through attempts of self-fulfillment?

Self examination and questioning your own purpose, along with creating joy throughout your life, is not the same for everyone.  I’m not saying go live life to the fullest everyday.  Jump out of planes.  Create a “bucket list”.  Go crazy as if you’ve only 24 hours left on earth.  President Obama said it best during his speech to the students in Arlingonton; “Every single one of you has something to offer.  And you have a responsibility to yourself to discover what that is.”  Commitment to yourself, commitment to your purpose, is what the human spirit it meant for.  Each of us has the responsibility of making our lives the best we can to the best of our ability.  Consistently reflect and remind yourself of your goals.  Examine the world you create for yourself.  You are the center of your own universe.  Like dominoes, if we each handle our universe with care and consideration the world could fall into a state of peace.